People who pretend they are Statues

In this crazy ol' world, I try to live and let live, I try to understand, forgive, love, accept.  There are a few exceptions, and I am going to use a word that I don't use that much - HATE.
Thats right, I HATE those people who pretend they are statues!!

This may be hard to believe - but this is not actually a statue.  It is a person.  a real living person.  Hard to believe, huh?  Looks just like a statue.

I think the correct term is 'living statue'.  They are so wrong on so many levels.

I was perhaps 13 when I first saw a 'living statue'.  And to be honest, I thought it was pretty cool, I really thought that this thing I was seeing really was a statue.  And then she moved.  You know what I thought, I thought, wow, that chick can really stay still.  This was in the days when the living statues actually made a bit of an effort.  Her paint work was quite good.  And I was young.

When I moved over to London, in 2005, I worked on South Bank, right next to the London Eye.  Obviously, this area is a bit of a tourist mecca.  Along the footpath, in front of the London Eye, during the peak of summer there was someone pretending to be a statue about every 5 metres or so.  Seriously.  There were fucking heaps of these dicks.  And they were shit.  Some of them did have paint.  Some of them didn't.  One idiot was dressed up as a bright purple fluffy flamingo for christs sake!

Look at this guy.  LAZY.  He isn't even standing up.  He does not look like a statue!!  Who would give him money?  What possessed him to get up one day, and think, hmmm, I am going to be a statue?

I am not sure how the payment system works - do you chuck a few coins at them if you think they are being good at staying still?  Some of them seemed to think they could then move if you gave them money - just an excuse I reckon, they were probably getting stiff.  Or some of them seemed to think they should get money if they gave someone a fright.

The ones that really get to me though, are the 'couple' living statues.  Ugh.  So wrong.  I can't even begin to explain why I hate them so much.

'couple' living statue.  And with two money receptacles.  This is the type of thing that I was confronted with every lunch break in London.   

But even worse than the statues themselves are the people who flock to them!!!  It is pretty obvious that they are NOT STATUES!!!  So why do people get 'surprised' and laugh when they move???  Why do people crowd around them??  And then go from one, to another, and then to another?  I just do not get it.

The only place worse than London for living statues, that I have come across so far, is Barcelona.